So ... schools on the moon?

Macaroni Grill Crayons

I was surprised to see that they are real Crayola crayons. (Forest Green, Blue and Brick Red according to my 64-count box,)

Harry Potter is in the air

Someone named happyhufflepuff commented on this blog and I thought maybe I found one of Harry's toys at Value Village:



But then remembered that he graduated from Hogwart's before Bionicle came out and yes I know it's not real because he wasn't allowed toys. Or live in Seattle. But!
If Harry Potter was going to have a muggly TCG, I think he would prefer one featuring amnesiac robot monsters on a tropical isle over D&D seeing as one is fantasy and the other one is Fantasy otherwise it would be something of a workman's holiday sort of diversion, wouldn't it?

INT. BASEMENT Teenagers sit around a card table crowded with books, paper, pencils and Mountain Dew.

MUGGLE TEEN ONE: I've just rolled up a Chaotic good paladin. What are you, Harry?

HARRY POTTER: I'm a powerful wizard with a hidden origin.

MUGGLE TWO: Use the dice, dipwad.

DUNGEON MASTER: Role-play, Harry. Remember what we talked about about how imagination can seem real?

HARRY POTTER: (to dice) Rollio!

MUGGLE TWO: What's that work out as?

DUNGEON MASTER: (checking rule book): Huh. "Wizard. Unknown alignment. Level 12."
MUGGLE TWO: Every freaking time. What are the odds?

Salad spinner is clearly awesome ...

... but using one to prep homemade hashbrowns is the best thing ever. Unless it's said in German via Google translate:

Hausgemachte Rösti mit einer Salatschleuder gemacht sind die besten.

4-D Chess?

Referring to newspapers floating the idea of paid internet versions:

"This is like a four-dimensional chess game. It's really complex," said former newspaper editor Alan Mutter, who is now an industry consultant when he isn't writing "Reflections of a Newsosaur," a free blog.

As if traditional chess isn't hard enough, let alone 3-D chess. (Mr. Spock notwithstanding.) The problem of dying print news is only as complex as 4-D chess in the sense that it is impossible to visualize. If you are a newspaperman.

To the rest of us, the problem seems more along the lines of attacking Moscow in winter. Sure you can do it, but you will lose everything that matters in the process.

Kitchen Mess

Before
 
After
 

Major Matt Mason Major Motion Picture Maybe

from the Wiki article about the astronaut doll:

As of March, 2009, there are reports that Tom Hanks is planning to portray Matt Mason in a feature film, possibly as both a human and a toy version, the latter presumably a CGI animation.

Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease

And a screenshot from Destination Moon, just because I can:

The President Lectures Students About Responsibility

Conservatives choose to opt out their kids. Wouldn't want the l'il cons to get mixed messages.

Doodle while on phone

Scanner didn't really do it justice.

From New Album 8/4/09 10:37 PM

Cleopatra

Extravaganza overwhelms thin scenario, but it doesn't really matter because the point of this movie is to wrap Claudette Colbert in a thousand yards of silk. At this, it is perfect. Title card is an extended wardrobe malfunction that probably created the Hays Office single handedly. Busby Berkley spectacles are interesting but a trifle silly. War montage is adorably hopeless. Claudette's eyes are bigger than anyone's except a Power Puff Girl.

'Twinkie King' wraps up sweet career | Seattle Times Newspaper

Nicole Brodeur | 'Twinkie King' wraps up sweet career | Seattle Times Newspaper
Her columns usually drive me up a tree but this one made me happy.

The Fascinating World of the Yellow Jacket

brought to you by Sterling international, Inc, manufacturer of fine insect traps.

From New Album 8/4/09 10:37 PM

There is no doubt that they work. Within an hour it had trapped a couple of Vespula vulgaris and attracted but not trapped V. consobrina. That's science-talk for bugs.

Terragen is still fun

First render:

Added different clouds, eroded rocks:

More erosion, different clouds altogether and random green:

Moved the sun:

Shrank world's radius as much as possible, raised camera:

Cool, but too time-consuming.

Stupid hand-eye coordination

I thought I told my drawing hand to make a picture of Raymond Burr, but instead it's clearly Jose Ferrer. Do I even want to know what neoronal transform was required to do that?

From New Album 8/4/09 10:37 PM

Tokyo Story

Country parents visit city children. Much of the goods are delivered wholly through the visuals so the subtitles are sometimes a distraction. Can't be helped, of course.

The Naked City

A basic pillar of cinema. Even the weaknesses are strengths. My favorite thread is the step-wise decay of Barry Sullivan's patience with a feckless suspect.

Old Man and the Sea

I had no idea how klutzy this is. Spencer Tracy is a fine actor, but he is badly cast. Sturges' direction is uninspired (he did more with spaceship models in Marooned than he does with amazing locations) and the score makes me want to slap Dmitri Tiomkin and I like Dmitri Tiomkin!
The fundamental problem is that it is all tell and no show. An illustrated radio play.

A tale told by an idiot - The Boston Globe

A tale told by an idiot - The Boston Globe

Unfortunate turn of phrase

U.N. urges governments to tap women to fight global downturn

It's not reasonable to expect Reuters to be up on every stupid bit of slang.

Monkey Goggles

Know Your Talking Animals
A perfectly good but far from comprehensive survey of the greats in voice acting.

Veggies from Next Door

Veggies

Jed is to Zeus as Granny is to

... Rhea. Jethro is obviously Hercules and Ellie Mae is a reasonable stand-in for Aphrodite. I don't know why this never occurred to me before. For the interested student: Solve Petticoat Junction for Dionysus.
Update. It turns out that Granny is Daisy Moses, Jed's mother-in-law and Jethro is, as I ought to have recollected, a Bodine. This throws things into a somewhat different light if I am strict with the family relations. Jethro's notable strength really does point to a Herculean cognate, though. Fiddle-faddle, I have no enthusiasm to look up Greek gods' cousins.
Update to the update. I propose that Jethro is a Titan, Epimetheus, a notable fool. But where is Prometheus? Perhaps the interested student could search for him in Petticoat Junction or Green Acres? The possible mother's-in-law for Zeus is a pretty wide field but Ellie Mae / Aphrodite's mother is Dione whose father is Epimetheus. Yes, Jethro is Ellie Mae's grandfather and I defy anyone to prove me wrong. Why shouldn't Bugtussle, Tennessee be every bit as inbred as Olympus.?

Smarter than the average bear.

They are doing it wrong.

Mr. Hogan is working on a prototype of a new model, the 550, for next year. State officials have agreed to test it by filling it with aromatic food and depositing it on Yellow-Yellow’s turf. “She’s the whole reason we’re doing this,” he said.

They are not building a better container, they are building a better bear. Sooner than is comfortable there will be a cadre of Adirondack bears selling derivatives to insurance brokers.

Seeds In My Yard

Colt .45 (aka Thundercloud)

Stupendously inept in almost every way but plenty of fun. Too many gaffes in front and behind the camera to even start to list.

Reading Comprehension

How old is Sarah Pratt

Spencer's Mountain

Wholly inferior first stab at Hamner stories. Not even a journeyman cast of family-movie troupers can overcome numerous debilities. Redeeming trivia: Wally Cox was discovered to voice Underdog via this dreck.
UPDATE: DVD extras include press tour interviews with Henry Fonda who is either exhausted, distracted by some calamity or just bored out his ever-loving skull delivering loopy yet cutting remarks about the movie.

The Statement

Several pluses: Unoffensive performances throughout. Michael Caine has adopted several new tics of the highest quality which serve one aspect of the film very well: the anti-thriller. His character is so old and decrepit that killing him is just gratuitous (and is not explained in the movie.) Decent photography. Not boring exactly.
Minuses: The telegraphing of events is so frequent and obvious that they almost start piling up on into each other creating a reverse echo chamber of meta-telegraphing. An inadvertent Memento. There is a very bad stretch where flashbacks, even more unneeded characters, and narration all happen in close proximity. Adequate dialogue but the plot is stupid.
But the biggest complaint is that it's just the Odessa File without Elie Wiesel. And also without the Dickensian reveal. One of the production companies is Odessa Films. Coincidence?
I find myself in complete accordance with this review.

Sudden Outbreak of Common Sense

Congress gets pay bill as bank bonuses swell | Reuters

Bionicle no longer matches color scheme